By Reid Smith
It is recommended that you take some steps to building fellowship BEFORE your first meeting. The first may sound obvious, but is overlooked by many people seeking to launch a new group: Build a core to your group by inviting friends before it even begins (pre-vite). Do this by inviting as many friends as you can think of and asking them to invite as many of their friends as they can think of.
After people have indicated interest or committed to come to your group, call ahead and confirm they are coming anyways. Once again, really encourage them to invite as many of their friends as they would like. Additionally, send an e-mail a day or two before reminding them of the meeting logistics and how you look forward to seeing them there. Don’t be afraid of being pesky or pushy. People usually appreciate these good-natured and thoughtful reminders at the onset of a new group experience. By taking these initial steps BEFORE your group begins, the likelihood of experiencing a successful take-off will increase dramatically.
When you talk with the people planning on being a part of your group, be sure they know how to get to the host’s home. Let them know you’ll be providing snacks and refreshments and ask them if they need any help making arrangements for childcare so they can be a part of the group. This step is important because a couple of factors that help to increase people’s commitment to the group are food and childcare. It is good for the small group leader to cover these things initially and then invite all the other participants to contribute later on.
- Suggested Group Calendar -
§ Winter: Starts around mid-Jan & completes by Spring Break
§ Spring: Starts after Easter & completes by mid-June
§ Summer: OPTIONAL (Starts after July 4th weekend and completes by mid- August)
§ Fall: Starts early Oct & ends by Thanksgiving week
OPTIONAL: Have a Christmas party together during December & resume contact right after New Year’s Day! |
Part of the small group leader’s job in creating an environment where biblical community can grow is to create the right atmosphere in the place where you will be meeting. This might sound trivial, but physical space affects people on many different levels. You can help people feel more comfortable by arranging the seating in a circular fashion so they are facing each other, having snacks and drinks ready before people arrive, minimizing distractions, turning off the ringers on your phones, and even providing soft background music.
These same things can be done whether you’re meeting in a home or the church building.[1] The important thing is to have them accomplished well before people arrive so that you can focus on greeting them at the door as they arrive and spending some quality social time as others show up and settle in. People’s sense of belonging will increase exponentially if you complete these simple steps in setting the stage for your first and future small group meetings.
Let the first meeting be a time of people getting to know each other. Take time to learn about the people in your group and facilitate a conversation that can help them get to know each other. For example, you can ask each person or family questions like: “What brought you to our church and made you want to return?” “What motivated you to check out this group?” “What do you hope to experience in this group?” After everyone has had the opportunity to respond, share the hopes you have for the group and express thanks for everyone being there.
After the first few meetings, it is advisable to arrange for a couple of other people to bring drinks or snacks to your gatherings – this raises the commitment level for returning and eases your load. Finally, take the lead in closing the group’s time together in prayer, giving thanks for each person present and for God’s blessings on your new group!
- Gathering Tip -
In looking at small group duration and frequency of meeting, what seems to work for many people in the North American culture today is a group that sets itself up to have 3-4 seasons or terms during the year – each of which has a shorter duration and higher frequency of meeting. A suggested meeting length is at least 90-min, but no more than 2-hours. |
[1] Generally speaking, homes tend feel more personal and relaxed so if a host home is available from the get-go, meet there. Sometimes leaders offer their home initially or they have the first meeting at the church and then determine a host home. It is recommended to meet in the same location for the first few meetings because it can be a deterrent for people to return if you start changing locations too early on. When you do change location, make sure everyone gets directions.