180- Connecting Lives
Imagine this;
You’ve just entered a new place; you know a few faces and names but have no friends or acquaintances. One person you know introduces you to a few people and they are very receiving and kind, they ask the polite questions, and you sense they really do care. Perhaps a friendship will actually come from these conversations. They even say, “So glad to meet you, let’s get together some time.”
Fast forward a few months. You see the same faces over and over again, sometimes they say hello. Mostly they give you the awkward smile that says, “I forget your name and don’t really have anything to say to you.” And with that they move on to someone they do know. You want to just go up and say hello, and get your self re-acquainted, but you reason with yourself that you are the new person… someone should be more friendly… perhaps the leaders… maybe you just haven’t met the leaders.
A few more months pass and you realize that you know all the leaders by name and face. One of them refuses to look at you… even if you are in the same conversation with them and someone you know. This of course makes you wonder if you did something that would have offended them. There is that other leader who talks to you almost every week, however the conversation is usually like this,
“Hey how are you?”
“Good”(you lie, because you wonder if they care)
“How are you?” (you ask because your not sure what else to say.)
“Good” They say it, nod, and act like that is all they have to say… and not sure where else to go with this conversation. After an awkward pause they tell you to have a good night and quickly find someone else to talk to.
Another month passes… you wonder if it’s worth even coming. You’ve missed the past few weeks for various reasons. You figure no one missed you anyway, so what’s the point.
One day someone at a coffee shop over hears you telling your friend “back home”. That you don’t feel connected and you’re not sure what to do. The nice person invites you to their church. Tonight. 7:00. Worship. Fellowship. They says it’s a smaller group and they would look for you there.
It’s a hard choice to make. Why go to another new place with more new faces, just to have the same thing happen? NO! You decide to stick it out. Tonight you’ll go to the normal place. The comfortably-uncomfortable place you’ve been going for months. Perhaps tonight will be different. You pray all the way there that someone will notice you. Maybe someone will say hello and invite you to hang out afterwards. Maybe a leader will offer to get you connected with a small group.
Same Place. Same faces. You’ve been here for an hour and a half and 3 people have said, “hey” not much more…The room is full. You look around and do quick mental math. About 150+ people in the room and you feel completely alone. You see the person who was so kind that first time the one who said “lets get together sometime” and they smile in your direction, You smile back, a flicker of hope dashes through your heart... In a split second your joy turns to sadness when you realize they are looking past you. The person who they were smiling at brushes past you as if you are an over grown rose bush in their path. You watch them greet each other; its as if they haven’t seen each other in years, yet you know they saw each other earlier that day! You look around. Pockets of people conversing, laughing, being “normal” friends. You wonder if you will ever find a friend in this crowd. As you look around the room again you feel the tears burning at your eyes. You head for the door. Half hoping someone will stop you and say hello, the other half knows that if someone does stop you… It’s no use no one does…just as your hand hits the door handle you hear the Pastor say “Have a great night________” You can’t even turn around to say anything… The tears have already started making there way towards the sidewalk. As you hurry to your car you wonder if anyone can hear the sobbing. Not that it would matter now. You start the engine, only you realize you can’t see through the tears… Your forehead hits the stirring wheel and the tears fall to the floor. You begin to wonder if you will ever feel connected? Will you ever have a friend in this place?
How many students in 180 have had this same experience?
What are the things in this story that could have easily changed and stopped the person from getting to the point they were at?