I can remember as a little girl having always a special place for Jesus in my heart. Though, as I got older I had put him to the side as I had tried to fill that empty place with a mans love. That left me always feling empty and used. At the age of 21, I met a much older man and though their were signs and God tried to warn me. I didnt listen and found myself pregnant with my first daughter. I think deep down I knew it wouldnt ever work, but I was raised by a single mom and wanted her to have both parents to raise her.We did get married, but was short lived and divorced three years later.
I poured myself into a good christian church down in California where I was presently living and received lots of counseling and prayer ! I worked and raised my daughter and her father saw her on weekends. It was very hard on me at times because I so didnt want to repeat what my own mom had went through and here I was. Somewhere later on my ex and I started going out and spending time together. He seemed sorry for leaving me and our daughter and seemed to want to make it work. We went to counsel with my pastor and he seemed so sincere. I found out I was pregnant with our second daughter and then as quickly as we got back together he was gone again. I pretty much went through this pregnancy without hes support. I think that hurt the most .
I did come to forgive their dad with lots of prayer and some resistance on my part for a while because the wounds were so deep and real, but knew that in order to be free I needed to pray for him and forgive and release him into Gods hands.
When my daughter was two yrs old I meet the most wonderful Christian man. Go figure we meet on a christian internet dating service. During this time I had to file a motion to move-away because my ex wouldnt agree. So I hired an attorney and after a long year battle in court I was granted that I could take my children to W A and start a new life with them an d my new husband. We have been married five yrs now and God has blessed me and my girls with a great husband and dad!
I am again in a custody battle with my ex because he is trying to bring up false allegations against me. I have to admit that I didnt think I could go through another court hearing, but God says he wont give us more than we can handle! I see Gods mighty hand in this and that he will once again deliver me from the enemy! I pray that my story would encourage any and everybody to not give up!! To know that God fights our battles and we come up on the other side better and not bitter. I see my two daughters 7 and 13 and how grounded they are in the lord and it makes me so proud of them. I am reaping the seeds that I have sown. Praise God, to him I give all the glory and honor for who he is and for what he has and continues to do for my family and I.